Mi Luna

Where would I be without writing? Without drawing and painting and coloring? Where would I be without the outlet of creativity? It has saved me these last few days.

It has been the only thing to unwind and unravel me enough for me to breathe free of a chest tight with worry.

Phee-yew!

So, so heavy. So serious. Mind on overdrive. Relajate mija! Respira! Don't forget to play!

It's been an intense and interesting time. I am practicing remembering that everything is passing and so not to attach myself to much to anything. (Riding the waves, not flailing as they crash over me.)

and I'm still smiling. and laughing.
full on belly laughs even. :)

Love to All-
Goodnight.

Shine Through

such an interesting blend
today
of sadness and light
i woke up crying
and let go
crying into the pillow
and into the faithful arms
of a friend
releasing whatever it was
that needed
to be let go of
i am trying to identify
and identify with
my pain less
letting the tightness
in my chest
unwind
and so i'll cry nameless tears
from an anonymous source
and just let it out
today
i am restless
in this
the new light that has
revealed itself
i wonder
will stillness ever satisfy?
or will it unravel like all the rest
of those times
when i've tried
to build a life in just one place
don't get me wrong
there were smiles
waiting around corners
and delight in surprising and
unlikely conversations
getting out of my head
scrubbing dishes and wiping counters
with gratitude
for those
who believe in our own goodness
and dare to try to make a difference.

Blues and Poker at 3am.

to be here, now.
to say yes.
to allow and accept my own happiness
to delight in it without guilt
even for a moment,
is such sweetness for my soul.

Today My Heart is Bursting

How can Life be so incredibly beautiful?
How can Providence be so true?

I am so grateful for these
unfolding days
such stunning sweetness
envelops me
all around, all the time
to find family
community
real-live heart work to
pour myself into
artists and musicians
creative activism
active creativity

Not more than a few dollars to my name
and I am the happiest, perhaps
that I have ever been.

God Bless the Child

so cold
and so much warmth.
cloudy dreams of
feeling torn and shedding skins
hair cuts
fresh starts and new beginings
taking chances
and learning how to
Trust
more, truly, and
again

the doors that i have shut behind me
no longer haunt me
instead i smile at them fondly
and step out into a new day
a new life
one that is raggedy and handmade,
perfect and beautiful
as sparkling as the snow that
covers everything

All right.

Earlier this afternoon, in the midst of losing my worried mind, I sat down with my notebook and poured out 5 pages. phew.
So now, I find myself here with quieter thoughts.

I am stable and transient.
I am feeling more and more at peace.
I am growing in generosity and abundance is finding me.
I kick back with my growing pains these days,
sit and watch and listen
toca la medicina and watch as doors open
as my heart unwinds herself
from her frenzy
and remembers
that all, cada uno, and every
little thing
is gonna
be alright.

"...Plus I have this whole new family

and I'm in love with each of them,
And I'm on this list called lucky
whenever I'm in reach of them..."

Life.

Days full of music and talking and healing and laughing 'til tears come. Nights full of good food, celebration, home-made meade, and more music.
Snow covered ground, cold fingers, afternoon coffee with cacao and almond milk, free-flowin' prophet friend of mine showing us his latest, painting parties, impromptu snowball fights, yoga and stretching and breathing, new songs to play and more to write....

Tejon

every day I drive past your street and blow you a kiss
hoping that somehow
through space and time
it might find your lips
or your cheek
or that soft place on your neck

your spirit has hovered
closely
these last few days
i listen to your mixes
and feel silly
laugh and remember and burn a little
that sometimes searing longing
in my chest
that asks to see, to touch, to taste, to know
to be close enough for tea
or whiskey
or a moto ride
to be more available
maybe just more around
in general
I,
miss you.

even more than I miss
my favorite beanie in the whole world.
and that's a lot.