Anxiety

i wake
with a familiar weight
on my chest
today I am
anxious, at best
i am holding hope so tightly
that it squeeks
in small protest
i have been moving so much lately
sifting, shifting, releasing
and still
and yet
this feeling has come to visit once again.
like some stalker in the night
it must have snuck in
through the window
which i have left open,
for the sake
of moonlight,
it sits on the edge of my bed
unsettling my heart and my head
with dreams like flashes
like flashbacks
like so many faces and flurry and fear
why now? why here?
i have been gathering
my bones
and all those pieces
long scattered to the wind
calling myself home
back to that place within me
that i Know, exists
then this
this unraveling weight
that sits on my chest
and refuses undoing
this pressure
somewhere between ribcage and battlefield
between repulsion and a broken gait
LET ME BE
or please, just wait
til something passes
til my grounding is more tangible
til my personal revolution
can gain it's momentum
til the day is through
or until
i can figure out
what to do with you