playing kitty-referee this morning
playing back conversations
in my head
i am cringing at my own heart
bleeding
on my sleeve
making a mess on the floor
forget it.
i hear myself say
just forget it.
but i'm not listening
and the words, still ringing in my ears-
that awoke me like an alarm clock
harsh and jarring
that came in without asking
that crashed into my cortex
and cracked my heart
i am reeling
somewhere between broken and not-feeling
it's one of those days
where your hands seem so far away
and i move
without thinking,
without really knowing
that i am moving at all.
and i don't have anything to say
and i can't hear your voice
over the static in my head
just don't say things without thinking
and then tell me
not to take it personally.
